I’m stuck. Only five days into NaBloPoMo and I am already anxious about what to write next.
Too many subjects floating around in my brain. Travel. Christian community. Teaching. Running. Parenting. Family. Music. How do I decide which ones to pursue? This month is largely about finding my voice and my passion, so maybe it’s okay if I try all of these topics at one point or another.
Another problem: I’ve been reading other blogs that interest me and that triggers the evil comparison game. These people all write more creatively, more poignantly, about more exciting issues than I do. Surely someone else has already said what I’m going to say, and they’ve probably said it better. I wonder, why bother?
I feel paralyzed by my feelings of inadequacy, my lack of vision, my fear of failure.
Is there anything I can bring to this online community of readers, writers, and thinkers? Is it worth it, even if what I have to say is ordinary? Even if it’s all been said before? As King Solomon noted, “everything is meaningless–like chasing the wind.” (Ecclesiastes 2:17).
This blog-a-day endeavor will have its high and low points, and I’m going to persevere. Although “writing books is endless, and much study wears you out” (Eccl. 12:12), I think there is value in this goal. There’s value in setting out to do something and following through. Considering my most recent post was on unfinished business, I have an obligation to myself to complete this task.
So if you’re reading this, I hope you’ll be patient with my fumbling attempts at transparency and truth. I hope you’ll extend me a little grace as I figure it out.